dephucker

2007-03-10T22:11:00.000+08:00

hey guys. im flying off to perth to visit my relatives in about an hour's time.
cya when i come back =) ADIEUUUUU!!

2007-02-27T14:43:00.000+08:00

Here are my prom photos. i dun know why but i suddenly look
exceptionally bad. must be the photos. too old. HAHAHAHA.

adrian and I. prob died in china or sth. =x

j.ong and i. exclassmates.

adora and i. PACKERS FOREVER!!!

sama sama.

pak, your eyes are weird. like never see camera before. HA.

hmm, why am i looking away. junkai and ron.

this BRUDDER here is tennis CHAMP ok. OKAY.. maybe sometime in the future.
NOT.

MONG DA BITCH BITCH BITCH!

NIGEL AND MY SMARTYPANTS. haha. smartest guy in class k. dun play play.

oooh. miss body beautiful. ANOTHER dun play play.

kian and jiayin.

sheryl and me. haha. hope you are still doing fine girl.

liangcheng and i.

CLEMENT KHOO. Kukubird are you.

mr tay and mr chairman. haha.

dawei.

serena and me =)

honda and nissan.

honda and sha.

jeremin, alison and i. haha. brothers forever!!!

daryl and i. sec 4 days were so unforgettable eh!!

pey yann, alison and i. CLUBBING ROCKS.

junyi and i.

gerald, ronald and i. hey, hope you all are doing fine in NS. POP when i go
in la. WTH.

sama.

me and brent. 4 years of classmates Eh!

HAHAHAHAHHAHA. EEEEEEENIAANNN DANCING LIKE A PRO.

cheryl and i. haha. dun know why we look so retarded.

now it looks more proper.

WHOSE CAMERA IS THAT ?!?!

hahaha. MICHELLE FONG DOING HER THANG!

me, prom king, ritzzy
and chris.

kaiqian aka class chair and i.

shimin and i. haha. i almost couldnt
believe she looked so great.

huixuan
and i. haha.. funny girl in class.

tiffany and i. prom queen nominee. WOW.

me and da girls.

da girls.

kian and i. close friends for life.

xuan yi and i.

wei en and i. haha. table tennis pro k.

sama.

shiru aka goldfish. haha.

chris, kian and i.

chris and i.

shiru, chelly, shimin and kaiqian.

same people. but upclose until kaiqian disappeared.

our clique : kian, ron , ritzy and me.

MISS LIM looking GOOOOD =)

weida.

gloria. another prom queen nominee who almost won it.

eenian and i.

kian and shiru. couple bliss.

class guys. from left : kian, gerald, junyi, ritz, ronald and me.

xuanyi and shiru. haha.

kian testing out his clothes.

best view ever from a hotel room. RITZ ROCKS. (not you ritzzy. haha)

PRE-prom. haha.

so there you go. my prom pics. haha. took
damn long to upload them. wouldnt have known how to if not for the help of
my cute and ROTUND cousin. haha. im technophobic la. so when it comes to
computers and web-blogging stuff, i really CMI . so.. haha. okay enough. i
dun want to blog alr. cya guys soon!

nigel.

2007-02-23T17:57:00.000+08:00

i realised my last post was in dec 2006. haha. im a champion procastinator la. so many events have passed since then but i dun really want to go digging into my brain and recollecting. i shall just start with cny.

well cny this year was nothing special, nothing great. we basically visted the same places again and stupidly.. while i thought we all looked great in our new clothes and stuff, we plainly forgot about the camera. so there you go. no photos at all. what a shame. but nonetheless, we ate a lot as usual, lotsa angbaos, lotsa gambling. On one of the visiting days, think it was the second, we went to our aunt's place. it was super funny there cos my brazilian cousins brought their female shitzu named jojo there. my aunt alr has this 2 year old jackrussel called lucky and boy was it fun to see how lucky reacted to jojo's presence. HAHAHA. lucky was superbly horny and went around sniffing jojo's privates and busily trying to hump her. im sorry if this is beginning to sound like a porn flick but that was exactly what the stupid dumb dog was trying to do. firstly, its just wrong for a jackrussel to breed with a shitzu.. you might get a weird looking mutant jacktzu or shitrussel with super powers!!! okay maybe not. but it was just wrong. so my brother and i went on a mission to protect jojo by all means possible. we covered her hind with a towel and made sure that she wasn't getting aroused by keeping her far far away from that pervetic dog. haha. but we soon realised that even jojo became horny. haha. but luckily, lucky was really a damn stupid dog or probably he was only 2 , that's why he still doesn't know how to do it. hahahah. lucky was constantly humping air la. OMG. and jojo was getting very very irritated. so it ended like that. and lucky was dumped. LOL.

so there's that. funny doggy-style experience. NOT ME LA. the DOG, you horny bastards.
results are coming out really soon. heard its going to be next friday.. first week of march. which is scary and nothing to be too happy about. but well, i guess ive gotten over the fear and the apprehension simply because i alr have my plans and whether or not i get good or bad results, there will still be a path for me to walk. and working yesterday at a camp at ITE(east) certainly made me feel that i was already a thousand times more fortunate than those kids.
well shanny informed me about a one-day job that was available because her friend backed out last min and so i went for it, thinking that i was going to be free and idle the whole day apart from night training. well when i heard it was going to be ITE kids that I had to work with, honestly i thought they were going to be handful to work with. and i know that i shouldnt be stereotyping these kids but its just a natural human response for us to generalise and make judgements in advance. but it was certainly a pleasant surprise for us coaches( we were supposed to take charge of a group of about 12 kids through several tasks).

i was in charge of group 12 and i must say i really really love my group. they are such wonderful ppl to be around with and though it took them a while to open up, the moment they did, the feeling was great. these kids weren't destructive or mischievous as many ppl label them to be. rather, they were very nice and friendly, warm and caring and most certainly MORE RESPONSIVE than most of us jc student. i dun really know why, but as soon as i got to know the way they were , i finally realised how a camp can really be FUN. their enthusiastic and competitive responses to whatever that was thrown at them really made the whole experience such an enjoyable one for me, and if i ever do get to meet any one of them again, i would really not hesitate to thank them. one of the questions posted to them during the whole one day camp was : " As an ITE graduate, what do you think are the challenges you are going to face in the working world?" and the immediate response was racial discrimination. it was really heart-wrenching to hear from the malay kids especially when they tell me the kind of struggles their parents had to go through to put them through school and how some of them stay as far as woodlands, having to travel like for an hour to go to ITE. well, way before that, i'd always think that ppl only do such things to go to a good and respectable school, not ITE. but now.. the way i look at it, i really think these kids really are brilliant and special in their own rights. its only a matter of opportunities for them. some of them are exceptional sports talents, some are great artists, others are natural leaders, but simply due to a lack of academic excellence, they have been landed in school that's deemed to carve out only graduates of technical education. i was like WHAT THE FUCK is going on man?!?!? im now starting to hate the sg education system more and more, simply because of the over-emphasis on grades. well this has always been discussed and debated on the newspapers, forums blah blah. but what ppl dun realise is this: once you put these kids into ITE, its really hard for them to carve out a living and push themselves out of the poverty cycle that they are already in. and this cycle will just keep going on and on and on. so whose to help them? whose to offer them a chance to get out of this shithole? NOBODY.

another thing i thought i should raise is this: the malay kids out there really deserve more help than us chinese kids. especially those in ITE . i dun really know whether its a culture thing or a family thing, but it seems to me that malay kids are much more enthusiastic, responsibe and plainly speaking fun to be with as compared to chinese kids. whenever i ask a question, or direct a task to the entire group, its always the malays kids to ownership over it, NEVER the chinese kids. yet a very large population of the ITE kids are malay. im like, come on.. somebody has to notice their innate talents and somehow allow them a chance to show what they are truely worth. i really feel very bad for these malay kids and i hope while im saying all these, something's alr being done to help them rise up the social ladder.

okay, enough of emo stuff. there was this girl that was damn farnie la. she had a crush on me and was constantly doing weird stuff la. at the end of the camp when the kids were all gathered and the coaches stood in front of the whole crowd, i realised that the girl was imitating whatever that i was doing la. WALAU. they are like freaking 17, 18 year old already la. that she was being very serial drama la. all the stupid love actions. haha, i was quite embarrassed and went to tell shanny about it. and then that STUPID shanny, went to tell her that i was interested in her as well. WINNER LA. guess what the girl did man. she was like.. EH YOU WANT MY NUMBER? I GIVE YOU LA. IT's 43298230948203948. IM LIKE WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and unluckily , we had to take the same bus as her too. so she was constantly pestering me like a some irritating fly for my number. alas, i couldnt take it so i gave it to her then now she's sending me weird messages. win alr. desperately need to change my phone number.

there were also several funny incidents in the bus which made shanny laugh until she was tearing la. haha. the bus was cramped to the max cos there was only that one bus at the bus stop so everybody was waiting for that one bus. so when it came we all squeezed into it and shanny and i were trapped very near the doors at the entrance where we had to stand on the steps. then came in this crazy woman in her mid years. she just rammed herself onto me la and her freaking boobs slammed on to my body can. i gave this weird jump and funny expression that made shanny burst out laughing damn loudly la. walau. damn embarrassing and everyone was staring at us like what the hell was going on. okay.. then nvm. we bumped into that girl which had a crush on me on the bus.. and then she crazily refused to let anyone sit beside her, saying she chop the place for me already. haha.. i refused to sit beside her and walked up to the upper deck. while i was walking up the stairs, the bus jerked and my shoe fell out. HAHAHHA. everyone started laughing like shit.. including shanny and the girl. then the girl said something else: " WALAU, I SO SCARY MEH. MAKE YOU DROP SHOE."
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA. i laughed like mad the moment she said that and couldnt stop for like ten minutes la. she was being super act cute. thinking about it now still makes me laugh uncontrollably.

okay so that was that. yesterday was really a crazy but damn fun day. i hope more of such days are coming my way. feeling sick now.. sore throat. so wont be going for training. sat maybe la.
cya later dudes!!

nigel

2006-12-29T21:11:00.000+08:00

let's see. x'mas is gone and in another 2 days time, its going to be 2007. time really really flies and i dun really know whether im ready.. for NS? for U? for all the nitty gritties that are going to come with it? oh well.. i guess whether im ready or not.. its still going to come and time doesnt wait for anyone so i decided that i had to do some readup on my scholarship applications today. didnt go for training in the morning and spent the whole afternoon reading up on the scholarships and basically getting some of the personal resume all done up.

ive actually decided to apply for 4 to 5 scholarships but the 2 that im confirmed applying are MAS and Astar. haha.. okok i can hear people screaming in shock and some of my closer friends going.. nigel you fucker.. what the hell are you going to do in uni with mas and astar? haha. so this is now an official announcement of the course ive finally decided on ..

first choice => medicine (hopefully getting LSA and staying in sg =( )
second (and most probable) choice => bioengineering ( majoring either in neuroscience or immunology in a US uni and minoring in lit and jap? egyptology? wine-tasting? haha. )
third choice=> econs at a jap uni (so desu)
fourth choice => lit and ppe (anywhere for that but us uni would be best)

so there you go. haha.. ive got plans A to D and i think they are pretty realistic as you can see. im actually more interested in doing bioengineering than becoming a doctor but i guess i will still try out for medicine though im quite sure i wont get it cos im just not cut out to be a doctor. if i do then ppl better beware.. dun come to me when you are sick cos i may just end your life.. or worse.. put you through more torture because i prescribed the wrong medicine. haha.. irony..
what about MY passion in lit then? yea yea.. many ppl ive spoken too would probably know that my real curiosity and passion lies in english lit and all the various permutations of lit.. from poetry to prose to drama to even haikus.. haha. okay maybe not haikus but you get where im going at.. i guess ive decided to put my foot down and really be realistic here. i know i would probably feel happier in lit and would really enjoy my uni life if i do lit.. but what about life after uni? isnt that where the real enjoyment of life really comes? family life? parents? standard of living? i guess i had better stop lying to myself.. i come from a really humble middle class background and my parents(especially my mum) have really shown me so much love and concern that i really want to let them a live a life of luxury and of course.. let ME live a life of luxury too.. hahaha.. materialistic himbo .. but what to do. its INNATE. so live with it ppl.. lol.
and bioengineering is not that bad afterall.. doing bio has always been my second passion.. and im really interested to know what goes on in the brain!! haha.. like you know studying and all.. and after i graduate.. coming out to research and produce drugs for ppl.. thats noble too.. so i dun really mind. and if i do bioengineering.. and do get an overseas scholarship.. i would be able to go to US and do a lit module too.. haha. so whats the harm in that eh? yeah.. so ive decided and my mum is fully supportive of it.. so i guess everyone is happy. and most importantly im so relieved too for having finally gotten off the fence and making a decision that i can live and stick with for the rest of my life.

ok back to present .. im actually getting very confused over whether i should really go for national team training. if i do start.. that would mean close to an everyday commitment thing that would take up three quarters of time and virtually eating up my life. and further more.. the national team is kinda screwed. there's no team spirit at the very least and there just isnt the usual unity that was getting me back to training time and time again that i had in hwachong. everyone there is there just for the sake of NS.. and once they are done with it.. they will leave. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK ?!?! POLO IS A TEAM SPORT IF YOU GUYS DUN ALR KNOW!!

and ivan's right. sometimes i dun see a point in going for their trainings and half the time.. the only reason im there is because my hc seniors are there.. like renkai, diyang, diyan and ivan. the rest? i dun really give a shit.. cos i dun really knoe them in the first place and also because so many of them there are arrogant bastards. trainings there have become so individualised that i dun see a leader leading a team to any destination but rather a group of highly anxious and scattered ants basically running around in all directions and are unable to get anywhere because they are all trapped in a bowl. but i do still want to play polo very much and it keeps my fitness there too.. so now im reallly really confused. and my brother told me that renkai commented that i was very slack in training .. only going when i want to .. haha. he doesnt if know me well enough and yet he's making such comments? haha. you must be kidding my ass! when there's a a true purpose in going for training like back in A div.. i dun even miss a single session.. even when im sick.. but when there's just no purpose in going for national training.. why should i be there when ppl there arent even serious about it?

oh well.. maybe im too narrow-minded and myopic and just jumping to conclusions. and i must admit.. im damn slack too. haha. but you cant blame me ok.. its really hard to get back to the rigorous training schedule after stopping for so long and thinking that you were never have to get back to it again. haha.

im tired .. will blog another time soon. cya guys!!! oh ya.. btw.. here's a shout out to all my friends who are december babies.. to eddie, chris and nick : HAPPY BIRTHDAY PPL!!! MAY ALL YOUR WISHES AND DREAMS COME TRUE!!!!
ciaos.

2006-12-25T23:38:00.000+08:00

MERRRRRRRRYYYYYY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY!!!

haha. i simply love christmas. its just such a joyous day where you get to be with your family and friends and simlpy immerse yourself in all the warmth that's around you. i like it! haha. but today was kinda fun. went to my aunty's place to have a christmas gathering thingie which was ok. not very exciting but lucky me, i brought along my oc cds so i managed to catch a couple of episodes there. was kinda emo-ed out but still im doing fine. i love oc btw.. its just so .. me. haha. i dun knoe what else to say.

oh yeah.. before i forget, may all your wishes come true too. christmas is all about that ain't it ? hoping for nice nice presents and simply revelling in the excitement and anxiety of what kinda gifts you're gonna get(those most of the time what turns out to be is never always to be and you have to put on a smile thats so full of pretense , you wanna knock yourself out sometimes), but still.. everything is all in the spirit of christmas.. so IMMERSE IN IT DUDES. but needless to say, family warmth during chrismas is something that i will give anything for all year round.

remembered i wrote a poem on christmas in 2004 after Os, when all was not quite well and i was writing about pretense and artificiality in friends.. haha.. christmas masquerade and all. but at the ripe old age of 18( okay maybe not that ripe) , i guess im a little less of the whole teen angst thing and a little more of the more-matured-less-whiny person ive grown to be. well christmas this year marks the last year im going to be student before i go for NS and so it means quite a lot to me. and its sad that in another 5 min time.. all is over. but i thank god for being able to be with my closest kins this christmas and to all you guys out there, be thankful that you have them with you as well. its the greatest gift of all, aint it?

peace out y'all! have a bell-jingling, turkey-stuffing, musical-chairing, pinata-wacking and most importantly, a very warmy christmas!

2006-12-24T01:04:00.000+08:00

im back. no exclaimation mark no nothing.. just dun really want this to be a big affair cos tons of ppl spotted my highly angsty posts back then and one by one they kept coming and coming. but still i will not be politically correct like some ppl may want me to be and i will keep swearing if you dun mind. cos its just me. dun like then you can navigate yourself away. its the 21st century dudes!

but still, im happy to be back. its been so long and i figured its about time i get my poems back on track before i completely lose touch and some updating as well of course. ok i wont go really far back but i guess i will start from 'A's. i dun think i put in as much effort for Os as i did for As, dun knoe why.. maybe cos im a changed person. i used to really think that results were the world but coming to jc changed my perspective big time. polo started to take precidence over everything, and then friends and teamates and then family and relatives.. but somehow it never came to studies. maybe because too many things have happened over the past 2 years and now when its really coming to an end, i start to realise why things have turned out the way they are now. family happenings like financial problems plagued and soon the death of my grandfather came. screwing up J1 and getting EEEE for promos left me virtually scholarship-less. losing the nationals back then didnt do me much good either cos it meant another year of silverssss and another year of crying. but still i dun regret getting that cos the friendship and camaraderie was so strong ,everything else just didnt matter. then it came to j2, where family problems worsened and preparation for As had to start. i took over the team and a whole new team unity and spirt had to be forged and needless to say the pressure began to build up. polo was everything for the first few months cos i really didnt want 4th silver to end off my polo season. and so studies werent that great either but we FINALLY won nationals. the feeling was just unforgettable and that took me to one of the highest peaks in my polo life. and to be able to end off school polo at the highest note was always a dream i never thought could be fulfilled but we overcame odds and did it.

reality soon seeped in and the imminent As loomed over as i turned mugger again. tried as best as i could to really mug and mug but it was very hard. somehow i din think i was always focused cos my mind just seemed to drift off to space uncontrollably. maybe because i really hated the subjects or maybe i was just not ready. but still i went for the exams and in a flash everything was over. dun really want to bore you with the exam details like some other ppl cos it really isnt your problem but still i dun reckon i did well. hopefully things will still turn out fine when feb comes around. and so now im back to training and like what miss lim said, going back to school training just make sure that everything is alright with the team before i go off to NS. but still ns is really a long way from now cos im enlisting in april so i really have lots of time. mum has been nagging like mad for me to get a job but im not really in a mood now. maybe next year la. but then yet again, next year is like 9 days from now? haha. wadeva.

been bumming around for too long and teacher tell me to quickly settle down and decide on which course and scholarship to apply in uni. have actually decided to try out medicine as first choice and do my bacholors in neuroscience if i dun get in. 3rd choice will be econs.. haha.. especially when i hate the sub so much ya? but too bad, it brings in the moolah so i dun give a shit. my goal in life is to make enough money to be able to stay with my family and parents confortably so if im able to do science in jc for 2 years without liking it, im sure i will be able to last a few more years.

and of course not to forget. there was prom. im really too lazy to upload the photos so lets just put it as a glamourous affair shall we? haha. sorry la i really damn lazy la.

okok.. i must put in my poem now or else cannot hand up to eddie's desk . haha. hope she's feeling better now after that long chat we had.. and hopefully the poem is therapeutic.. like she said. so here's the poem and i dedicate this to eddie.

Thorns

if i gave you a rose would you take my hand?
bite it for the thorns or love it for the scent?
if i gave you my hand would you grasp it so tight?
or turn away, take off and ditch me in flight?

i told you once i'd promise i'd swear,
wherever you go i'll follow you there.
i never knew words meant so much to you
i thought if broken your heart could be glued.

my mummy did tell me to stand true to my word,
be frank, be honest, be truthfu,l be courte'.
but if love and friendship were made to endure,
would one little white lie really really hurt?

when mummy did leave me for a land far far away,
she told me she was going for a holiday at the bay.
i totally believed her, took every word to heart.
only to realise she lied from the start.

so now im doing unto what was done to me
for now words were never as heavy as they used to be.
who would have known you would take grudges so hard and strong
one that would shatter the love in a song.

Regret as i may of my ill-striken fate,
no key would ever open the locks to your gate.
she was my one true love, my friend, my soulmate,
but like she said, it was just too late.

i told myself that it was about time
to ditch the diction , the sins of lies.
so guys out there you'd better listen hard
girls take lies like thorns in their hearts.

hope you like it though. haha. ok.. i havent bathed yet. shit .. 1 am alr. okok.. i better get going.
yeah.. im so happy i completed the poem the way i wanted it too.. cya guys soon!

2006-01-30T22:46:00.000+08:00

2005-11-08T21:00:00.001+08:00

Reco for the day:
My chemical romance -- The ghost of you
The darkness -- Love is only a feeling
Fort minor -- Believe me

First things first, PW IS GONE ! yeah... with that i can safely say this : DOCTOR MY ASS. TO HELL WITH ALL YOUR RULES AND REGULATIONS, YOUR FUCKING IDIOSYNCRASIES AND YOUR PISSOFF ACCENT(it isnt even accurate for god's sake!). NO LONGER DO I NEED TO PUT UP WITH ALL THESE SHIT and while you are still hc , MAKE GOOD USE OF THE TIME HERE, cos i gurantee you wont be here for long =)

phew. i wanted to say all that since ages but never got the chance to. it's really relieving to get all that off my back. haha. I've decided to add my recommended songs as part of the intro for all my blog entries during the hols cos i really have nothing to do!!! stuck at home watching MTV all day long and so i will offer my suggestions to those who need to restock their music bank. haha. so enjoy =) P.S. : The second song is really good so go hear it at least once , guranteed satisfaction. haha... i sound like a retail manager, but i dun really mind.

Doing my insights and reflections was really the most pretense and hypocritical thing that i have ever done.
"Learning how to compromise and understand one another in terms of work allocation and group meetings and effective communication in terms of the oral presentation and amongst fellow group members to ensure a two-way transmission of ideas were the essentials of project work which this experience has certainly left me with. While project work was indeed an arduous process, the satisfaction and joy reaped at the end of it all was certainly worth the effort. "
In reality of course, i learnt nothing out of the whole experience. get what i mean now? pw is all about facades and pretence which i totally cannot stand, but i guess it is a hidden requirement in the criteria of pw. for people who do not knoe what the hell pw is , let me tell you this. There is certainly NO satisfaction and certainly NO joy our of the who process. i heard that pw is still going to be made compulsory for the later batches of J1 so good luck to you all.
im done with mine and im off, no more turning back and project work to worry about. CHEERS =)

Going to ritz with mong, chris and nick was definitely still as fun as usual. i dun knoe why but the four us just click/clique in some way that is so fun and happy to be around with. mong's laughter that day was highly contagious i tell you. it seemed that he breathed in laughing gas or something , totally losing control of his laughter with tears rolling down his cheeks. haha, thinking about it now still makes me want to laugh. well, we bitched and bitched and bitched and we laughed and laughed and laughed. the food was still acceptable but i thought the tiramisu ice cream and the sauteed beef were great. apparently SR NATHAN was there on that day too. HA. big deal ... and we thought we were the VIPS. blah.. haha... im turning uglenish. sorry.

there is class outing on thurs and class chalet this coming monday. i dun knoe whether i should go (although i have paid) . i just cant seem to find anyone that truely knows how to have FUN as a group and while i knoe kian and ritz are still ok , there just isnt that enthu and excitement that i had when we had 4A chalet. im quite sure there wont be any of the memorable nights that i had with koon at 4A chalet, or the fun times playing DOA2 with nick, daryl, yy, mong and everyone else, or the crazy late night walks that were simple but unforgettable. seriously i dun see any point in having a class chalet. i maybe antisocial in that sense , but well i guess im in just a totally different league la. i feel like asking others along but i think it wont be nice to the 71 ppl , so i guess im not. blah, as of now ... i dun have a class. i only have friends, not a class.

actually i still have more stuff to blog about but im too tired. shall do it some other time. cya.

2005-11-04T21:26:00.000+08:00

ok i'm back. well i thought blogging will never be part of my life ever again. but there is always this element of surprise when you move on in life. yup... you guessed it rite. JC LIFE TOTALLY TOTALLY and i say it one more time TOTALLY SUCKS. period. there is nothing worth remembering in jc and i think that the only reason why im in hc is because of polo. haha... obviously it seems like im going to turn lotsa jnrs who wish to come to hc off. ok, the phrasing for the previous sentence sounds weird, but i cant care less. geez, it feels good to be back blogging because

1) I CAN START BITCHING AND BACKSTABBING EVERYONE THAT I DO NOT LIKE INCLUDING MY FUCKING C****.

2) Life in hc bores me to death ( sorry muggers , i knoe this does not apply to you) and so i need room for release. cathartic release. god bless me.

and therefore im back. training is back too. and so are the holidays. but there is seriously nth to be happy about cos i did so badly for my exams. enough said. but luckily there is lot of time for me to catch up and i will do just that. i dun knoe how i screwed up my exams but i just did which means no more s papers , no more scholarships ----> NUS. god save me.well, i guess nus is not that bad lar. at least it gurantees you the same old fucking degree that will get you a job and a decent pay. but i guess its no more oxbridge , princeton and any other ivy league universities. ARE THERE IVY LEAGUE UNIs ? haha... i guess not but you get what i mean.

lotsa great movies to catch during the hols. sky high, harry potter, just like heaven ... and the list just gets longer. but then there is also fucking pw which is next mon and my group is so slack that i think we are going to get band3. fuck. no way ... im going to score for my op and there is nth you can do about it . kian lets go all the way and earn at least a deserved band 2. haha. but then whenever its about pw i just feel so slack and lethargic. i dunnow i guess its probably due to the many projects that ive done back at chs that it is now so boring and un-exciting. and talking about pw , it reminds me about dr siva. we shant go into that shall we?ok i just realised that my previous 2 sentences serve no purpose. lol.my eyes are tearing already due to the chlorine. and i think im going to embark on my poems again before i completely lose touch with the literary world which dehumanises me as a person, transforming me into a science geek whose dictionary consists of only one word which begins with m and ends with g.

Present-ly
prepared. ready.optimistic.
lists shouts out loud.
name not heard.
3 weeks. parents. society.
resigned to fate.
present past future.
past gone , future bleak.
present-ly ?

bliss. happiness. joy.
calamity strikes and finances fall apart.
court delivers predicament.
debts. mother. uncle. fuck.
gloom leaks near.
present past future.
past gone , future bleak.
present-ly?

friends.confidantes.fun.
environment changes and friends separate.
life shifts to a different paradigm.
hypocrites. losers. muggers.
excitement apparates away.
present past future.
past gone, future bleak.
present-ly?

enough of patterns , enough of shapes.
poems don't always have to be this way.
so does life : past present or future.
past gone ? future bleak?
unwrap the present.
something's lurking,
waiting
for you.

haha. i wrote this spontaneously in twenty minutes. totally bored to death at grannys with cousins spouting nonsense and making lotsa noise. argh, my eyes are tearing already and i think im going to catch some shuteye. cya.

2005-11-04T20:49:00.000+08:00

back with a vengeance =)